Tuesday, September 15, 2015

Throwing My Hat in the Ring...Again

The opinions expressed below may be offensive to some; continue reading at your own discretion.

I think this is the fourth time I've tossed my hat into the presidential campaign ring.  As you can plainly see, I have been unsuccessful in my bid three times.  Perhaps the fourth will be the charm.

Here's part of my platform:

ALL gas tanks will be filled from the driver's side--no exceptions.  Why haven't manufacturers come to that conclusion themselves?  No more jockeying for a spot at the pumps.

ALL convicted prisoners will be microchipped.  No exceptions.  We spend millions of dollars tracking escapees; microchips will eliminate the need for manhunts and pay for themselves many times over.

There will be a child-free shopping day each week.  That's right, plan ahead, because no children will be allowed in any shop on the designated day.  And perhaps that day will also be cell phone free, as well.  Remember the good old days of leaving home to get away from screaming kids and the ringing phone?  What was wrong with that?

Remember turn signals--or when people used to use them more often?  It's not like we have to stick our arm out the window in all kinds of weather before the invention of turn signals.  My suspicion is that there was more signaling in those days than now.  And why are turn signal lights so small?  Most cars are bigger but have smaller lights.  Why is that?

This is just the beginning of my campaign.  Let's get the word out.  Stroud for President!  And I am going to be the first tiara-wearing president.  And I may carry a wand scepter.  The Queen shouldn't have all the fun!

Blissful presidential-hopeful hugs,
Sharon


7 comments:

  1. I fully agree with all of these--thumps up--
    and you need to add one---
    if one lives in a senior place--no bitching is allowed!!!
    smiles, di now in Florida

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  2. Hi Sharon,

    You are only allowed to carry a scepter if it is solid and heavy and you use it to hip obnoxious people over the head! Otherwise, what good is it?

    Martha in NE Ohio

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    Replies
    1. Sorry for the typo. That was HIT people! Hit publish too soon.

      Martha in NE Ohio

      Delete
  3. I love that platform . . . I think there might be a few more to add . . . One designated sewing day per week, no other activity allowed . . . Chocolate is the official food of our country, duh! . . . I will let you do the rest.

    Terri H in Penna.

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  4. OK there has not been a posting from you since Sept. Little tidbits of information along with pictures are wonderful. Hope to see something soon.
    Safe journeys
    Pat B

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